“Yes! I know what you mean. I love my husband, but when he snores, I want to slap him” Susan exclaimed!
“Lisa, let me walk you through the simple 10-second snoring test our Sleep Doctor did to determine of ZenGuard was the right fit for David”.
“Ok, let’s do it!” I replied.
Susan continued, “Like I mentioned before, the key here is that it’s almost impossible to snore with your tongue out. So first, try making a snoring sound with your tongue inside your mouth like normal.”
“Ok” I said. “skuuggghhh”
“Great” Susan said. “Now stick your tongue out and try to make the same snoring sound while your tongue is out”
“Ok” I said. “Hmm, I can’t do it. There’s no snoring sound”
“Exactly!” Susan said. “That’s the point! That’s when I realized that this device would work on David, and it will probably work on your husband too.”
“Ahh, you’re right!” I said. “What a simple test, thank you Susan! I’ll make my husband do this test tonight. But what if he doesn’t want to wear it?”
Susan replied, “That’s the same question I was worried about. As you know, my husband David is the definition of a “tough guy”. He drives big semi-trucks for a living, rides a Harley, and shoots his pistols at the gun range on the weekends just to name a few of his hobbies, he would never wear this tongue device I thought to myself. Fortunately, however, once David and I were in the same room with our sleep doctor he explained the logic - and the benefits just far outweigh the costs.
“For example,” Susan continued, “Our sleep doctor told us that the top 3 health problems snoring can cause are memory loss, stroke, and heart attack. All of those are life-altering problems. That’s crazy. Just tell him that, and it should be enough to get him to wear it.”
“No” I replied, “That’s not enough. My husband is tougher than your husband. He has three Harleys and shoots an AR-15 on the weekends, and the only pistols he shoots are those 50 cal things you see in the movies that probably aren’t even legal. I’m going to need to tell him more than that in order to get him to wear this thing”
“Hahahaha” Susan laughed, “Ok, you’re right, I’ve met your husband John, and he is one tough cookie. Remember when you guys first came over for dinner? He almost knocked our front door down when he knocked and almost broke my husband’s hand when they first met and shook hands.”
“Yes, I remember that!” I said. “Ahh, those were good times! Anyways, tell me what else I should say to convince my husband to wear it”.
Ok” Susan replied, “Tell him there are lots of health risks, just tell him that snoring can cause stroke, heart attack, memory loss, loss in productivity, and more. And many times, snoring is actually sleep apnea in disguise - and sleep apnea is really dangerous. 80% of sleep apnea cases go undiagnosed so people don’t even know they have it! That’s what Reggie White, the famous football player, died from in his sleep. “Oh yeah, I remember that tragic story. Remind me, what’s sleep apnea again?” I asked.
Susan replied, “That’s when people have such bad snoring they basically stop breathing periodically throughout the night - which causes oxygen loss and all sorts of other health problems like I mentioned above like stroke or memory loss. Plus, get this Lisa, you know how I like to watch CBS news right?